10 Years Merry!

July 25, 2001

Ten years.  More than a third of my life so far.  Basically my entire adulthood, I have spent with you.  (In fact, there were only a couple of months of my entire adulthood that I wasn’t mooning over you/dating you/married to you.)

When we got married, on this day ten years ago, I had absolutely no idea what I was getting into.  I was a teenager, a child of a broken marriage, and a new convert to religion.  I was a romantic, an idealist.  I thought I knew what love was.  I thought I knew what marriage was about.  I thought I knew exactly what would happen next.  I was so wrong.

In ten years, I’ve changed.  You’ve changed.  We aren’t even similar to the people we were back then.

But somehow, magically, wonderfully—we changed together.  We aren’t the same people we were.  We’ve grown up.  Hopefully, for the most part, we’re better.  You make me better, that’s for sure.

In ten years, I’ve seen the worst parts of you.  And you’ve seen the worst parts of me (and the grossest, because, let’s face it, having a baby is gross, especially when it involves vomiting on your spouse!).  But we’ve also seen the best in each other.

I am continually blown away by your absolute and unwavering devotion to me, to our marriage, to fidelity and love and the bond that we created when we were joined.  It’s inspiring to me, and makes me want to live up to all that you believe that I’m capable of.  You are my safe place, and the only place I let my guard down.  I trust you completely with my feelings and my heart and my insecurities, and you never violate that trust.  I cannot imagine my life without you in it.

For ten years, you’ve hung up my towels, done the dishes, and cleaned the bathrooms.  For ten years, you’ve left your socks wherever they may fall, you’ve found ever-increasingly gross things to eat and drink, and left dirty Tupperware to grow into science projects at work.  For ten years, you’ve made me laugh, let me cry, held my hand, and supported my dreams.  For ten years, you’ve laughed at my jokes, fathered my children, and been my best friend.

Ten years later, I’m still a romantic and an idealist.  I believe that we stay married because we want to stay married—because we are committed to making it work and resolving any problems.  We are committed to staying in love.

I love you.  Every day I love you.  I feel so blessed for our first ten years, and look forward to all that the future holds for us and to sharing those experiences with you.  I am still as giddy and mad about you as I was on July 25, 2001.  Happy anniversary, my love.

True Love

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Livin’ In Bliss

I hardly ever blog anymore.  It’s not because I don’t enjoy blogging–I do.  It’s not that I don’t have anything to say–I do.  It’s not for any reason that has anything to do with blogging, actually.

But here’s the thing–I’m living the dream right now.  I live this blissed out existence where everything is working and happy and warm and fuzzy and filled with bubbles, rainbows, and ice cream sandwiches.

I am fortunate that right now, I get to stay home with my kids.  Oliver and Hazel are amazing and I am absolutely in love with them, and every day I am blown away by their awesomeness.

"The Gooj"

Oliver is five, and regularly reads chapter books–and comprehends them.  He can be reasoned with, he’s really intelligent, he’s funny, and he’s a lot of fun to be around.  He’s incredibly affectionate and really thoughtful.

"The Geej"

Hazel is 3, and she’s just begun reading.  Watching the light bulb over her head when she sounds out a word and then realizes that she knows exactly what she just said is something that I just never want to turn away from.  Pretty soon, reading becomes something a kid can just do… and not something that delights them with every word.  She also has the most expressive face, and comic timing that must have come from someone other than me.  She loves animals more than dolls (and is currently pregnant with a female baby puppy she’s going to name Clifford), and loves me more than anything else.

Kullervo

I also have this wonderful, intelligent, hilarious, super hot husband who I get to spend my evenings and weekends with.  He gets up with the kids, he makes the best pies I’ve ever had (his pie crust is seriously to die for), and hanging out with him is my favorite thing to do, whether we’re watching movies together, playing board games, spending time with friends, or reading together.

I wake up in the morning to Hazel giving me hugs and kisses and telling me that I’m beautiful and cute and she loves me.  I eat breakfast to Oliver and Kullervo telling me how lovely I am.  Really–my life is totally surreal.  My kids act up and frustrate me, and I yell and get angry… but then I remember they’re little and they’re learning how to exist in this huge world, and I apologize for yelling and being grumpy.  And we have dance parties.

I spend my afternoons outside, where, on our little street, we have about 20 kids under the age of ten.  And the kids all play together, and the parents are all awesome.  We wind up keeping all the kids out much too late… because everyone is enjoying themselves too much to want to go inside.

Knocked Up!

On top of all that, I am 24 weeks pregnant, and while I haven’t kept up with the journal documenting everything about being pregnant this time around… I have enjoyed every minute of it.  When I was feeling sick to my stomach in the first trimester, I realized it wasn’t nearly as bad as it could have been, and enjoyed my body’s reminder that it was busy doing a wickedly cool science project.  This second trimester has been lovely, where the only negative side effect has been being so. incredibly. tired.  And while I’m coming into the uncomfortableness of the third trimester, complete with swollen ankles (ha!  who am I kidding? I don’t have ankles anymore!), an inability to see my feet, and the ‘wanting-to-roll-over-at-night-but-that-means-heaving-myself-and-all-those-pillows-over-and-oh-yeah-while-I’m-awake-I-really-ought-to-go-pee’.  I also get to participate in a fetal growth study, which means that I get to have extra ultrasounds, and all of them are 2-D and 3-D.

So, basically, I haven’t been blogging, because my life is so amazing right now that I am just enjoying every day, living in the moment, making the most of this magical time in my life.  One day my kids will grow up and realize that I’m not the most beautiful person in the world (Kullervo’s eyes aren’t getting any better, so he maybe won’t realize), they won’t want to smother me with kisses when I have morning breath, and their friends will be way cooler than me.  But today?  Today is amazing and unreal and beautiful, and I refuse to take any of it for granted.

The Four (point five) of Us