According to the lists I found on the Internet, on the 15th wedding anniversary the gift should either be watches or crystal. I have a works-well-enough-for-me watch and no desire to own any crystal. Like, ever. So Kullervo and I decided that we would forgo tradition and go for ink instead. While he has a handful of tattoos, this would be my first, so I wanted to make sure it was just right.
Our next decision involved figuring out what the tattoo should be. What would represent us–fifteen years of us–with all of our inside jokes and arguments and values? On a long road trip home from Tennessee, we made a list. We wrote down all the things that we could think of that described Kullervo, and me, and us, looking for something to jump out at us.
Nothing did. Or, rather, nothing did in such a way as to really capture who we are in a form that would translate to skin.
Driving down the Interstate, we grew quiet. The radio was playing, the kids were reading, and we were lost in our own thoughts.
Some time later, Kullervo said that he might have an idea. At the same moment, I thought that maybe I did as well.
He wanted me to listen to something, and cued up a YouTube video for me to listen to.
While we waited through the ad at the beginning, I butted in, “What about a mason jar?”
His video came through, and we listened to this together.
This is a part of a series called “For the Life of the World” and is really a fantastic video series. And in this chapter about love, hipster Adam and hipster Eve say yes to each other. To sacrifice and to pouring themselves out into the world, into children, into messiness and brokenness. They say yes to each other.
As it happens, when Kullervo and I got married in the Mormon temple, we didn’t say ‘I do’… we said ‘yes.’
And right then, we both knew that our tattoo had to say yes.
But what about the mason jar? Why that?
We only drink out of mason jars. Water, chocolate milk (don’t judge), beer, wine… we serve it in a mason jar.
And if you know us, you might know that we have intentionally structured our life in such a way as to follow Jesus Christ as best as we can. And one of the ways that we really try to radically live that out is through hospitality. What’s radical about hospitality? After all, it sounds like the same kind of radical that geometry homework is. Or being told that your talent is that you’re a compassionate person. It sort of sounds boring.
But here’s the thing. You can come to our house. It will be messy, it will be chaotic, but you are welcome here. At midnight, you can show up at our door without notice, and we will bring you in and feed you and love you and not resent it even one bit. More on that here:
Not only that, but a few years ago, we started canning our extra food and making our own jam. We grow some food, we preserve it, and when we pop open a jar of tomatoes to toss into our spaghetti sauce, we wash the glass and it joins the other glasses. And when we have too many glasses, we realize it’s time to start canning again. There is something really neat about the ebb and flow of having, and then pouring what we have out for the sustenance of our family, and then taking what’s left and pouring into it for the short term needs of hydration. Our mason jars are work horses.
For us, the mason jar represents following Jesus and living into the gifts He provides and the ways we can use those gifts to provide for others. It represents our marriage because we intentionally live into that, with all of the messiness and sacrifice that it brings.
So, sitting in the car that day, we realized we’d both just had the right idea. And we realized that a mason jar, which usually has the brand name written on the side, could say Yes instead. All of a sudden, we had our tattoo.
*Note: I asked Kullervo what to say when people ask what the tattoos mean, because this is sort of a long-winded explanation. His response?
“Just say that it’s some hipster shit.”